Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Our American God with Reverend Roy Pentecost


Brothers and Sisters,

The Gospel of Mark shares with us our savior Jesus Christ rejecting the demands of the Pharisees to produce a sign from above. Jesus responds to them, "Amen I say to you, there will be no sign given to this generation." (Mk 8:11) Well my brothers and sisters a sign has arrived. And that sign was presented to me in my July 18th edition of The New York Times.

The headline read, "Abstinence Education Faces and Uncertain Future." God as my witness I nearly fell from my kitchen chair. Luckily as I read on I discovered that other God-fearing Americans were upset and were rising up in arms over this important moral issue. Rather than share my own feelings about abstinence, I'll allow my old friend Eric Love, who is quoted in this New York Times article, explain the beauty of abstinence.

“You have to look at why sex was created,” Eric Love, the director of the East Texas Abstinence Program, which runs Virginity Rules, said one day, the sounds of Christian contemporary music humming faintly in his Longview office. “Sex was designed to bond two people together.”

To make the point, Mr. Love grabbed a tape dispenser and snapped off two fresh pieces. He slapped them to his filing cabinet and the floor; they trapped dirt, lint, a small metal bolt. “Now when it comes time for them to get married, the marriage pulls apart so easily,” he said, trying to unite the grimy strips. “Why? Because they gave the stickiness away.”

Thank you Eric for sharing with all of us the importance of 'the stickiness' that our God, Jesus Christ has given us!

But now my brothers and sisters allow me to explain to you what will happen if our children are deprived abstinence education in their public schools. Just imagine, "dirt, lint, a small metal bolt," attached to your young son or daughter. Except by dirt, lint and a small metal bolt, they mean STD's, alcoholism and being soft on terrorism.

By teaching our children to suppress the natural instinct to explore their bodies and associating adolescent questioning with mortal sin, we are saving the next generation of Christ's children. The Devil comes in many forms my brothers and sisters. Whether it be tight fitting clothing, make out sessions in the local shopping mall, graphic anime, snickering at the name 'Dick' or an unintentional erection while sitting on the wheel seat in a school bus. The Devil is everywhere.

The old slogan, "I gave my word to stop at third," can no longer save our children in this super sexed up era of commercialism and multiple partners. I'm now proposing new slogans to prevent the spread of 'Satanic Transmitted Diseases' within the kingdom of God here in America. Slogans such as: "Osama bin Laden wants you to make out, he says all the cool kids are doing it," and "Karen gave it up, Jesus gave up Karen," or "Everytime you nail your girlfriend you're just nailing Jesus to the cross all over again." I'm hoping to have 10,000 bumper stickers with these slogans on the road by next month.

Brothers and Sisters, together we can save our children.

God Bless you and may God Bless America


1 comment:

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